By Abiodun Ogunjobi
For anyone who is keeping a close tab on developments on social media, there is no doubt he/she will be puzzled at the rate of divorces and marital splits. Notable is that of celebrities and stars from Nollywood, music, sportsmen/women… the list goes on. Many have alluded to social media as the bane of marital bliss and the main cause of domestic woes.
To avoid this jinx, many stars now advise their peers to keep their marriages and relationships off the social media space. But, there are many who wonder if the social media space is truly to be blamed for these unfortunate developments.
A certified Christian counsellor and Bible teacher, Mr. Abiodun Ogunjobi seems to be of a different opinion. In his words “social media is neutral in nature. It can used for good or for bad. Just like money, social media in itself is neither good nor bad. It depends on how it is used.” He went further to explain the need to refrain from demonizing social media.
According to him, many of these stars would have remained unknown, if it was not for the publicity that social media gave them. Many of the social work that has impacted countless millions today would have remained undone or gone unnoticed without the instrumentality of social media. Social media has given a voice to the voiceless and has created an avenue for citizens to hold their governments and political representatives accountable for their actions and decisions.
Abiodun Ogunjobi, who is also an experienced marriage counsellor, further explained that rather than blame social media for the marital woes of celebrities and others, we should look at cancerous lifestyles that are stretching the fabrics of marriage. These include infidelity, physical abuse, selfishness, unforgiveness and the likes. The truth is that, after all the pomp and pageantry of the wedding ceremony, the longevity of any relationship/marriage is built on the choices people make or refuse to make daily.
Perhaps, what makes many people point an accusing finger at social media when celebrity marriages fall apart is the fact that many of these, from relationship stage to the wedding party, are hyped on the same social media, hence causing the ripple of their crash to fill the global internet space for all to see. But to indite social media as the root cause of marital troubles is a diversionary measure.
Recently, the statistics of couples filing for divorce in courts in Abuja, Nigeria, went viral and the numbers scared many. The truth is that 99% of such cases are everyday people, most of whom have never acted in a movie, recorded a music video, or been in the public eye for any other reason.
Lest we forget, there have been many sweet stories of couples who are still together in their seventies and eighties. Pictures and videos like these evoke positive emotions when shared on social media. They travel far to encourage those who are hurting, so that they can believe and give love another chance. How would they have travelled if it not through blogs, TikTok, Facebook, Whatsapp, Twitter, Instagram and other social media platforms?
Abiodun Ogunjobi concluded by stating that we are looking in the wrong direction when we blame social media for what is caused by the consequences of people’s choices and actions. The earlier we call a spade a spade, the sooner we can save the now-endangered institution of marriage.
About Abiodun Ariyina Ogunjobi
Abiodun A. Ogunjobi, is a teacher of Scriptures and a minister of the gospel. He studied Theology at the Redeemed Christian Bible College (RCBC) an Institution established by The Redeemed Christian Church of God, Nigeria. He is a certified faith-based counsellor from The International Institute of Faith-based Counselling, Texas, U.S.A, and is also an expert on several aspects of Christian counselling, including pre-marital and marital counselling, drug addiction and rehabilitation, trauma etc.